The Tattoos are Revealed...

This man is the love of my life and I his. We wanted something on our bodies that would always connect us to eachother. Jewelry can be taken off and lost. Tattoos are with you always. The question was...What do we want to get? We didn't want names. We wanted something that symbolized us and our relationship. So many things were considered. We kept coming back to our song. It is the most random song. It came out while we were dating in high school. At the high school dances, Ben would sing it in my ear as it played. So "Follow Me" by Uncle Kracker eventually became our song. The title is very fitting for us. With Ben's career we are never close to family and constantly moving away from friends. We follow him and his career. Where ever he is, I am home. I would and will follow him anywhere. Our tattoos say "Follow Me" with 8-2-2 (our anniversary) beneath it.  I debated for a long time on whether we should post this picture. Or any picture because of the placement. Then I decided that our bodies may not be perfect but our love is and that is worth shouting from the roof tops. :)

Doctor update - easier than calling everyone.

It has been a frustrating few months to say the least. I thought my memory was improving but recently it has been worse again. I am to the point that I just want to stay at home and not see people. I am tired of feeling stupid. I LOVE the military life, but right now it is really hard. During this time I want nothing more than to be with my close friends from back home. To be with people who love me no matter how forgetful, stupid sounding, or emotional I am.

Review: In July 2011, I started having migraines. They were quickly diagnosed and the medication I was given helped as long as I took it as soon as I felt the migraine coming on. Then in November I was cleaning the kitchen when I started to get dizzy. This isn't real uncommon and the spell usually passes quickly. This time it didn't so I sat down on the floor. Then the whole right side of my body went numb. Ben was even confused and called 911. They took me to the ER. I couldn't remember hardly anything short term. The migraine started about an hour after the initial onset. CT was clear and they sent me home after things started to lighten up. After that it took a couple days to feel like myself again and even longer for my memory. I saw my primary doctor and she referred me to a neurologist.

So for the update...It took forever to schedule a neurology appointment so my doctor sent in the request twice. This kind of worked out for me. I ended up seeing the on post doctor last week and an off post doctor today.

Visit with the on post doctor was frustrating. At the visit he seemed like he was going to be helpful, but when he called back to give me results, I felt very pushed aside. He decided I had an attention problem that was affecting my memory. Not a memory problem. While I agree that I have attention issues, there are things that I forget that I have attended very closely to and conversations and events that I was interactive with. To me that is a memory thing. You don't repeat yourself several times because your not attentive to yourself.

I was thankful I didn't cancel my off post appointment. I went to see a neurologist today. While he was definitely concerned, he doesn't know what to do. He said that I have a very odd case. The possibility that I had a mild stroke seemed to be his best guess. I had a CT during my major episode though and it was clear. But all my other symptoms lead to that. He wants to have a MRI done. Other than the memory issue, he was concerned about my left side weakness/lack of coordination. Again, this is really weird because my right side was the one that went numb during my episode. He wants to talk my primary caregiver and see if she could order the MRI. Being civilian limits him with my insurance . Maybe if the 2 of them discuss my case, they can figure out something.

I was very disappointed. He really didn't seem to think there was anything he could do to help with the memory. All I want is to feel normal again. To not be constantly self conscious and worried about what I am saying to people. Worried that they have already heard it, maybe even a few times. So if you talk to me and I repeat something, please just forgive me for being annoying.

I am very thankful for my husband though. He is being very sweet through all of it. There have been times that he has wanted to strangle me, I'm sure. But he keeps reassuring me that he is there no matter what. It is amazing how comforting that is right now. So thanks babe. ;)

I'll continue to keep you posted as I know more.